When was the last time you tried something for the very first time?

How often do we snuggle up in our comfort zone, because it’s cozy and warm there and nothing rocks the boat? Fair enough. It’s safe there. But how much fun is it, and how good is it for us, really?

I’m someone who loves safety and coziness, but I also like trying new things every now and then, creating new experiences. It sounds contradictory, but that’s how it is. It depends on the situation, and on my mood. I was raised to play it safe whenever I can, so I wouldn’t get hurt, disappointed or whatever else. I don’t blame my parents for that, in fact I understand them. But I don’t want that feeling for Sofia either.

I’ve written several times about what a cautious child Sofia is. How she’ll never do anything unless she’s completely sure it’s safe, in every sense.

And then kindergarten happened. Over time she started to relax a lot more and try new things. And for that we’re endlessly grateful to the dedicated staff at her daycare, who worked with her every day and gave her completely different experiences from the ones Marko and I gave her at home.

And amid all that variety, with us and without us, Sofia grew into herself. She’s not a mirror of me or of Marko, she’s not our copy. She’s her own person.

Proof of that was the surprise we arranged for her yesterday. In a village not far from the town where we live, there’s a farm with lots of gentle horses, where every so often they organize horse riding for kids.

A little girl in a riding helmet on a horse at a farm

Together with her friend from kindergarten, Sofia has become obsessed with horses over the last couple of months, and everything revolves around them. From clothes to toys, everything has to have a pony on it. So it was only natural for Ema’s mom and me to plan a surprise for our girls and take them riding.

Sofia had no idea what was waiting for her until we got to the farm, which made the surprise even better.

Now, I expected she’d need a few minutes (read: ten or so) to warm up to the idea of riding, going up to the horses and everything that comes with it. But I was wrong, very wrong.

As soon as she saw the other kids on horses, she could hardly wait for me to put the helmet on her head and ran off by herself to the first free one. The girl leading the horse helped her climb up, showed her how and where to hold on, and that was that.

The next two hours flew by like a moment, for her and for me. Every ten minutes or so she’d switch horses, so she tried out every possible size. As the ponies trotted faster and faster through the woods and meadows, she squealed with happiness and excitement, shouting “faster, faster”.

I Wasn’t Scared…

Actually, the biggest surprise for me was that I wasn’t scared or stressed for a single moment. I didn’t have those moments all moms usually have (and me especially), sitting on pins and needles, afraid something might happen to her. No, nothing. With a smile on my face I kept clicking away with my camera and was happy because she was happy.

And there’s no greater reward for me than Sofka’s smile.

The people working at the farm were so lovely that once the riding part was over, they even let Ema and Sofia feed the ponies, and even brush and clean them. Without a second of hesitation or fear, the two of them did that too and loved every minute.

And What Did I Learn from All This?

Riding was never even mentioned in my childhood, not even the idea of something like it. I didn’t even put on my first pair of rollerblades until after I got married, with my husband convincing me I could do it. All my life I’d been sure I couldn’t, that I was too clumsy and that it was dangerous for me because I wear glasses. And after I hurt my knee playing basketball, I was certain I’d never get on rollerblades. And I was wrong. I got on them, learned to skate at 25 and loved it. Hey, I can do that too.

Since then, for me there’s nothing I can’t do. I can try and fail. And of course I won’t be indifferent about it, but I’ve learned to face defeat like a champion (at least I think I have). And when I see how Sofia can do anything and how she wants to do everything, it gives me extra strength and motivation that I can too. So who knows, maybe soon I’ll get on a horse too… Because why not?

Yesterday Sofia tried horse riding and loved it. Tomorrow she’ll try something else. And I’ll be there to cheer her on, support her and make it possible as much as I can, and of course to learn from her. Who says only children have to look up to their parents? When I grow up, I’ll be like my Sofia.

Because Sofia is my hero.

S-Mama