Look at Me – I Can Do Anything!

When was the last time you tried something for the very first time in your life?

How often do we snuggle into our comfort zone, because it’s warm and cosy there and nothing rocks the boat? Fair enough. It’s safe there. But how much fun is it – and how good is it for us really?

I’m someone who loves security, loves feeling safe – but also loves trying new things from time to time and creating new experiences. That sounds contradictory, but that’s just how I am. It depends on the situation and on my mood. That’s how I was raised: play it safe whenever you can, so you don’t get hurt or disappointed. I don’t blame my parents for that, quite the opposite – I understand them. But I don’t want that feeling for Sofia.

I’ve written more than once about Sofia being a cautious child. How she will never do something she isn’t completely certain is safe – in any sense of the word.

And then kindergarten happened. And over time she began to relax much more and try new things. For that we are endlessly grateful to the dedicated staff at the nursery, who worked with her every single day and gave her entirely different experiences from the ones Marko and I were able to give her at home.

And in all that variety – with us and beyond us – Sofia developed into herself. She’s not a reflection of me or of Marko. Not a copy of either of us. She is entirely her own person.

Proof of that was yesterday’s surprise we’d arranged for her. In a village not far from the city where we live, there’s a farm with many gentle horses that regularly organises riding sessions for children.

In the last few months, alongside her kindergarten friend, Sofia has become completely obsessed with horses. Everything revolves around them – from clothes to toys, everything has to have a horse on it. So it was only natural that Emina’s mum and I organised a surprise for our girls and took them riding.

Right up until the farm itself, Sofia had no idea what was waiting for her – which made the surprise even more effective.

I expected she’d need a few minutes (read: ten) to get used to the idea of riding, approaching the horses, and everything that goes with it. But I was quite wrong about that.

The moment she saw other children on horses, she couldn’t wait for me to put the helmet on her head, and ran over to the nearest free horse on her own. The girl leading the horse helped her climb up, explained how and where to hold on – and that was that.

The next two hours flew by for both of us. Every ten minutes she’d switch horses, trying out every possible size. As the horses trotted faster and faster through the forest and across the meadows, she screamed with joy and excitement, shouting “faster, faster!”

I Wasn’t Scared. Not for a Single Second.

The biggest surprise for me was actually that I wasn’t frightened or stressed for even a single moment. I didn’t have those moments that all mums normally have (and me especially) – sitting on pins and needles, terrified something might happen to her. Nothing. With a smile on my face I kept clicking away with my camera without stopping, and was happy, because she was happy.

There is no greater reward for me than Sofka’s smile.

The people at the farm were so wonderful that they also let Emi and Sofia feed the horses at the end, brush them, and groom them. Without a second’s hesitation or fear, the two of them did all of that – and loved every moment.

What Did I Learn From All of This?

Horse riding was never part of my childhood – not even the thought of it. I didn’t even put on my first pair of rollerblades until I was already married, after my husband convinced me I could do it. My whole life I was certain it wasn’t for me, that I was too clumsy and too risky because of my glasses. And when I injured my knee playing basketball, I was sure: rollerblades – never. And I was wrong. I put them on, learned to skate at 25 years old, and was completely thrilled. Hey, I can do that too.

Ever since then, for me there is nothing I can’t do. I can try something and fail. That won’t leave me indifferent, of course – but I’ve learned to face defeat like a champion too (at least I think I have). And especially when I see how Sofia can do anything and wants everything, it gives me extra strength and motivation that I can too. Who knows – maybe I’ll get on a horse myself soon… Because why not?

Sofia tried horse riding yesterday and was thrilled. Tomorrow she’ll try something else. And I’ll be there to cheer her on, support her, and make possible what I can – and of course, to learn from her. Who says only children have to look up to parents? When I grow up, I want to be just like my Sofia.