{"id":6794,"date":"2025-08-13T16:34:08","date_gmt":"2025-08-13T14:34:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/smama.blog\/?p=6794"},"modified":"2026-01-04T16:22:53","modified_gmt":"2026-01-04T15:22:53","slug":"bodyshaming","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/smama.blog\/en\/bodyshaming\/","title":{"rendered":"Bodyshaming Under the Sun \u2013 Impressions from a Greek Beach"},"content":{"rendered":"
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On the beach of an average small Greek town, you can come across all kinds of people, not only depending on which countries they come from, but also in terms of their manners (or lack thereof) and culture (or lack thereof).<\/p>\n

Three days spent on the beach are more than enough to gather impressions for an entire book, let alone for one or two articles.<\/p>\n

But not every situation is worth recording, while some absolutely need to be brought to light.<\/p>\n

I couldn\u2019t help overhearing the conversation of a married couple lying on sunbeds right next to us\u2014not because I particularly enjoy eavesdropping on strangers, but because their conversation was anything but quiet. Like it or not, I was forced to be a witness to their exchange.<\/p>\n

So, a man in his 30s, built and weighing about as much as an average bloated walrus, starts lecturing his wife, who is sitting right next to him, while their three-year-old child plays happily in the sand.<\/p>\n

\u201cSeriously, you could finally lose a little weight! Just look at yourself!\u201d he grunts at her, pointing his finger toward her stomach.<\/p>\n

At first, she says nothing, instinctively stands up, and looks down at her stomach in confusion.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with me?\u201d she replies defensively, gesturing to show that she doesn\u2019t actually have a \u201cbig\u201d stomach.<\/p>\n

But that\u2019s not enough for him.<\/p>\n

He continues to verbally insult her with words I won\u2019t quote here, because there are limits to decency\u2014limits he clearly doesn\u2019t recognize.<\/p>\n

The whole situation is topped off by the cynical smirk of the guy sitting next to him (presumably his best buddy, because in both body type and, apparently, mental makeup, they look like two peas in a pod).<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, man, just look how much she\u2019s let herself go,\u201d says our walrus, turning directly to his fellow specimen to put the cherry on top.<\/p>\n

The humiliated woman sits back down and instinctively crosses her arms over her stomach to cover her \u201cimperfections.\u201d A moment later, she even gets up and puts on her beach dress.<\/p>\n

The saddest part is that situations like this aren\u2019t rare, and similar male behavior is unfortunately very widely accepted in our environment. Some would even classify it under a term I\u2019m especially allergic to\u2014tradition.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

No one has the right to lecture others about their physical appearance.<\/strong> It\u2019s absolutely irrelevant what the relationship is between the verbal abuser and their victim.<\/p>\n

Whether it\u2019s a husband, wife, mother, or father\u2014it doesn\u2019t matter. In fact, in these situations, such comments have an even more toxic effect.<\/p>\n

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The toxic masculinity of the typical Balkan man, the so-called \u201chead of the household,\u201d<\/strong> often goes hand in hand with his physical appearance, because by unwritten rule, he can look however he wants and \u201clet himself go,\u201d wearing a bloated belly proudly like a trophy\u2014as if a belly were proof of masculinity or status.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

And yet these same \u201cheads of households\u201d expect or even demand, like our walrus on the beach, that (their) wives always look like they\u2019ve just been photographed for the cover of Cosmo<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Double standards!<\/p>\n

In a short-lived relationship, I once got a comment from my then-partner that it was \u201cabout time I waxed again.\u201d The only thing removed as quickly as a strip of cold wax from the skin wasn\u2019t the hair from my legs, but his presence in my life.<\/p>\n

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Because that\u2019s how it starts\u2014today, \u201cfix this,\u201d tomorrow, \u201cfix that,\u201d and before you know it, you no longer feel good in your own skin and you feed your insecurities with his approval. No, thank you.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

We live in a world that is set up in such a way that girls are programmed from an early age to be insecure, to believe that something is wrong with them<\/em><\/strong>, that they constantly need to \u201cimprove,\u201d wax, tighten, put on makeup\u2026 All with the underlying message: to be more attractive to men.<\/strong><\/p>\n

The world shouts from every direction: something is missing in you<\/em>. And when such behavior comes from those close to you, it only adds fuel to the fire.<\/p>\n

A man can be a walrus and not lose his worth, but a woman has to be a runway model?! Nope. Not on my watch!<\/p>\n

A woman can look exactly how she wants<\/a>, as long as she feels good in her own skin.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Read that again!<\/p>\n

And how did the story from the beginning end?<\/p>\n

This was one of those situations where the bully needed to be shown, in a polite and perhaps to him incomprehensible way, that his behavior was unacceptable.<\/p>\n

So I demonstratively stood up, walked over to the so-called \u201calpha male,\u201d and casually remarked:<\/p>\n

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\u201cGood thing you\u2019re the spitting image of Brad Pitt.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

He didn\u2019t expect that.<\/p>\n

Neither did she.<\/p>\n

A faint smile of silent agreement and female solidarity lit up her face.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I\u2019m tired of sitting and watching, staying silent, and thereby tacitly approving such behavior. I know I won\u2019t change him or his actions, but I can hope that she knows she\u2019s not alone\u2014and that she finds the strength to stand up for herself, for her own sake, and even more for the sake of the little girl playing carefreely by her feet.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

Because children learn by watching us\u2014never lose sight of that.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Sincerely,
S-Mama<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

 <\/p>\n

<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

On the beach of an average small Greek town, you […]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":6800,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[858,828,1510],"tags":[1011,1489,2070,2067,2069,1064,891,1494,1186,2076,2075,1487,2072,2079,2068,1436,1925,2071,2074,1269,831,1194,2078,2073,902,1400,1486,2077,2066,1488],"class_list":["post-6794","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-myth-busting","category-s-mima-en","category-witch","tag-balkans","tag-bodyshaming-en","tag-controlling-womens-bodies","tag-double-standards-for-women","tag-emotional-abuse","tag-female-solidarity","tag-feminism-en","tag-feminizam-en","tag-freedom-en","tag-gender-equality","tag-gender-inequality","tag-greece","tag-misogyny-in-everyday-life","tag-modern-feminism","tag-patriarchy-and-gender-roles","tag-patrijarhat-en","tag-personal-essay","tag-public-shaming","tag-raising-children-by-example","tag-ravnopravnost-en","tag-short-story","tag-sloboda-en","tag-social-commentary","tag-standing-up-for-women","tag-strong-women-en","tag-summer-body-en","tag-toxic-masculinity","tag-verbal-abuse","tag-verbal-abuse-in-relationships","tag-women-solidarity"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nBodyshaming Under the Sun \u2013 Impressions from a Greek Beach - 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